AZwildcat Posted July 30, 2012 Share Posted July 30, 2012 Hey I just met you And I'm crazy Guess what I'm pregnant And it's your baby 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Royal Posted July 30, 2012 Share Posted July 30, 2012 Hey I just met you And I'm crazy Guess what I'm pregnant And it's your baby 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swizzle Posted July 30, 2012 Share Posted July 30, 2012 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pbar Posted July 30, 2012 Share Posted July 30, 2012 Was leaving base on Friday (Hickam AFB) and saw a protesters loons demonstrating against "chemtrails". Wish I had that much time to waste... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spaceman Posted July 30, 2012 Share Posted July 30, 2012 (edited) Was leaving base on Friday (Hickam AFB) and saw a protesters loons demonstrating against "chemtrails". Wish I had that much time to waste... I read that wikipedia article, and then that lead me to the article on Cloud Seeding, where I found this picture. Do they really use A-10's for stuff like this? Edited July 30, 2012 by spaceman Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SocialD Posted July 30, 2012 Share Posted July 30, 2012 WTF!!!! People come home to find squatters in their home. Somehow it goes to court...update: squatters have 48 hours to leave. WTF is wrong with this country!?!? If this had been my house, they would have left with two .45s to their face! In Texas, the story would have been...5 dead after local home owner returns to find illegal squatters in his house. http://denver.cbsloc...iving-in-house/ http://denver.cbsloc...-judges-ruling/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
M2 Posted July 30, 2012 Share Posted July 30, 2012 WTF!!!! People come home to find squatters in their home. Somehow it goes to court...update: squatters have 48 hours to leave. WTF is wrong with this country!?!? If this had been my house, they would have left with two .45s to their face! In Texas, the story would have been...5 dead after local home owner returns to find illegal squatters in his house. http://denver.cbsloc...iving-in-house/ http://denver.cbsloc...-judges-ruling/ Colorado has a castle law. The statute states that “any occupant of a dwelling is justified in using any degree of physical force, including deadly physical force, against another person when that other person has made an unlawful entry into the dwelling, and when the occupant has a reasonable belief that such other person has committed a crime in the dwelling in addition to the uninvited entry, or is committing or intends to commit a crime against a person or property in addition to the uninvited entry, and when the occupant reasonably believes that such other person might use any physical force, no matter how slight, against any occupant.” (Source) In other words, he should've shot their asses in the first place. Of course, being a kind Texan, I would've kindly asked them to vacate the property immediately while showing them the business end of my .45. A simple 'vámonos' and a sweeping of the barrel would suffice; but after that fair and legally sufficient warning, there would be no 48 hour waiting period for them to comply... What's this world coming to? Cheers! M2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StoleIt Posted July 30, 2012 Share Posted July 30, 2012 WTF!!!! People come home to find squatters in their home. Somehow it goes to court...update: squatters have 48 hours to leave. WTF is wrong with this country!?!? If this had been my house, they would have left with two .45s to their face! In Texas, the story would have been...5 dead after local home owner returns to find illegal squatters in his house. http://denver.cbsloc...iving-in-house/ http://denver.cbsloc...-judges-ruling/ Sickening. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
polcat Posted July 31, 2012 Share Posted July 31, 2012 WTF!!!! People come home to find squatters in their home. Somehow it goes to court...update: squatters have 48 hours to leave. WTF is wrong with this country!?!? If this had been my house, they would have left with two .45s to their face! In Texas, the story would have been...5 dead after local home owner returns to find illegal squatters in his house. http://denver.cbsloc...iving-in-house/ http://denver.cbsloc...-judges-ruling/ Makes me want to throw up. Just UFB! And no wonder why the US has so many problems. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DFRESH Posted July 31, 2012 Share Posted July 31, 2012 Skynet: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jughead Posted August 1, 2012 Share Posted August 1, 2012 When Grenade Fishing Goes Terribly, Terribly Wrong So, I pose the question: Is this "WTF," or is it "Holy shit that's awesome ('cept for the nearly killing yourself part)!," or is it merely a footnote on the Darwin Awards' also-rans list of not-quite-successfuls...? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SocialD Posted August 1, 2012 Share Posted August 1, 2012 A buddy sent me this recently. Not sure if this has been posted on here before, as it's a pretty old thread. http://forum.bodybui...20921191&page=1 Alright...I don't care if you guys believe me ... it's real. This is the the most embarassing thing that I've ever experienced... it was a horrible night for me.. and I'm sharing it with you guys because I don't want any of my misc brahs to have to go through this.. especially since it all could have been EASILY prevented. I have added MS paint images so that you have a better idea as to what happened. It's very long, but I'll do my best to recount all of the important details. no ****ing cliffs..... read it to save yourself from something like this... Anyway... If you've been following my social anxiety thread you would have learned that I got an asian girls number during my last update (the encounter wasn't recorded unfortunetely because my Camera froze). But anyway, it's been over a week and I was feeling like taking a break from exam studying, and I figured that if I didn't call her before exams were done then I wouldn't get a chance to see her until after the break (which would be too long perhaps). So I called her up and asked her if she wanted to take a break from studying and meet me for coffee. Well she said yes, and we met at a campus cafe. We had some small talk, and it went well overall. After that she said "hey my roomate is making some chinese food for dinner because her boyfriend is over, would you like to come by and try some? she usually makes way more than needed". Now at that point I felt like I had to take a sh!t, but there was no way I could turn down this opportunity; it seemed like she was into me and this would be a great opportunity to get to know each other further. So I decided to try and hold my crap as long as possible (I don't crap in public toilets) and accept her invitation. Well we went back to her place, had some food (very good btw)... and ****... I had to take take a sh!t really badly... and I also had to take a piss really badly (I had been holding that too since I didn't bring my pee bottles with me to the date)... I really didn't want to use her washroom because I didn't want stink the place up... but it became so unbearable to the point where I could feel the turd popping out of my rectum.. to make matters worse I was actually starting to get an erection (I'm not sure why.. but that's what happened). So I rushed to the washroom... and thus begins the worst possible scenario imagineable. I pull down my pants step up to the toilet and I am then faced with an ominous predicament; I have to extremely badly take BOTH a pee AND a POO.... AND I have an erection.... what the **** do I do? Which do I do first?? So I bend over and try to push my erected penis down a bit to pee into the can... but as I relax my pelvic floor muscles to release the urine.. I feel my turd start to come out at the same time! So then I'm like "fuk this... I'll just try and hold the pee and let the poo come out"... so I sit on the can... grasp my penis hard to try and "block" it... and I then tried to let the crap come out....that didn't work so well... As I relaxed my anal sphincters... my pelvic floor muscles relaxed as well and piss started flying all over the floor... I started panicking at this point... so I desperately held my crap again, while I attempted to shove/bend my erect penis into the toilet. Once it was in... I tried take the piss and crap at the same time, but my ass was too far out and this massive turd started flying out missing the bowl, landing partially on the back rim and partially on the floor. I then closed everything off again (you can't imagine the pain of repeatedly blocking yourself from peeing and pooing when you have go so badly)... wtf was I supposed to do? I either pee on her floor or poo on her floor....then out of sheer desperation and instinct an idea popped into my head: I ran into her bathtub and let myself go there... I figured that at least this way I could rinse it all down instead of getting sh!t on her floor.... At that point things get even worse... The turd wouldn't ****ing dissolve... and the damn bish was asking me wtf I'm doing showering in her washroom.... I then answer "yea lol... I'm showering... is that ok?"... she says: what the hell? why?? you don't think we're having sex do you??? At this point I can't even think straight and I jokingly (retardedly) say: yes we are lol she then gets mad and says: wtf? is this some kind of joke... get out of there!! I say: no please don't come in... I'm not done yet... At this point the hot water I was using to try and dissolve my sh!t was releasing sh!t smelling vapours all over the room.. and it was pretty rancid... the girl could smell it and she said: "why the hell does it smell so ****ing bad? What the hell are you doing in there???" I say: please don't come in... trust me.. you'll regret it... she says: **** this... get out now or I'm unlocking the door.. I beg her not too... but she loses her patience and then opens the door. She stops dead in her tracks. There before her was me standing with a pseudo-erect penis, left over fecal residue on my ass,large semi dissolved turds in her bathtub, turds on the floor beside her toilet, and pee all over the floor in front of the can... I was so ****ing embarassed... I started shivering... she looks at me while covering her mouth and nose and whispers... "wtf did you do???"...she was starting to cry... I hesitate for a bit and I try to explain myself "I tried my best ... I... I'm sorry"... She then flips out and tells me to clean up the mess or she's calling the cops. I agree to do it. She leaves, and I grap some toilet paper... pick up the turds from the floor and bathtub, toss them in the can, and then I proceed to clean off the floor and bathtub with soap, water and alot of tissues. I tossed most of the tissues into her toilet bowl (the garbage was full eventually). I then took some perfume from the counter and tossed into the bathtub to get rid of odour. After I was done I cleaned my ass off and flushed the toilet. To my utmost dismay, my massive fecal matter bulk and the large amount of TP unded up clogging the toilet and it overflowed and started spilling crap all over the floor... I'm literally crying at that point... I look for the plunger but I couldn't find it so I put my pants on and rushed out to ask her if she had a plunger so I could fix the toilet...I see her with her roommate and her roommates bf... she's crying... as soon as she sees me she tells me to gtfo right now... I try to explain that the toilet is clogged... but she doesn't let me ... she says she feels threatened and she wants me out now... she graps a knife from the drawer and tells me to leave... I leave. about a minute later I hear this loud scream coming from her dorm room (I assumed she went back to the washroom to see it covered in poo water). At that point I sprinted away as fast as possible, while swearing at myself and crying tears of frustration and embarrasment. All of this could have ****ing been prevented if I had just brought my goddamn pee bottles!!! WTF?!?! The FIRST girl that shows interest in me.. I have to go and **** in her bathtub???? This is ****ing retarded (yes mad). to all you people saying "peeing in bottles is stupid/gross"... well **** that... not only is it more convenient and cleaner, but it also prevents epic disaters like this one.... This is what WOULD have happened if I had my trustee pee bottle... I would have on sat on the can and then simultaneosly peed into the bottle and pooed into the toilet. No disaster... no mess.... and none of this would have happened. anyway... should I let things cool off for a bit and call her back? maybe to apologize/explain myself? or should i just hope I never run into her again? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFM this Posted August 1, 2012 Share Posted August 1, 2012 Well, along those lines. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HU&W Posted August 1, 2012 Share Posted August 1, 2012 New democrat strategy “The report says nothing about the suspect being a Democrat," Chief Deputy Mark Lucas told the Daily News. "I think this was just because he was male." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nsplayr Posted August 1, 2012 Share Posted August 1, 2012 New democrat strategy That's awesome...name/face recognition is the first step to earning votes! If his girlfriend was indeed cheating on him with Mitt Romney it would be a hell of a step up from the looks of the dude. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
polcat Posted August 2, 2012 Share Posted August 2, 2012 SocialD, there are just too many WTFs! F'n hilarious. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 2, 2012 Share Posted August 2, 2012 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rancormac Posted August 2, 2012 Share Posted August 2, 2012 WTF did I just watch? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fuzz Posted August 2, 2012 Share Posted August 2, 2012 I'm with rancormac, wtf was that, I swear I lost about 20 IQ points watching that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SocialD Posted August 2, 2012 Share Posted August 2, 2012 WTF...Brought to you by your local moon hoax people! 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snooter Posted August 3, 2012 Share Posted August 3, 2012 http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=dc2_1343850266 I laugh at this guy but then again I think of what I would do if I saw a B-36 fly in person... 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PolyestherDuck Posted August 3, 2012 Share Posted August 3, 2012 http://www.liveleak....=dc2_1343850266 I laugh at this guy but then again I think of what I would do if I saw a B-36 fly in person... Somebody give that guy a wetnap or something. It sounded like he needed it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TacAirCoug Posted August 3, 2012 Share Posted August 3, 2012 WTF...Brought to you by your local moon hoax people! You sonofabitch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beaver Posted August 3, 2012 Share Posted August 3, 2012 Somebody give that guy a wetnap or something. It sounded like he needed it. I'm kind of disappointed that I've never been that stoked about anything. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 3, 2012 Share Posted August 3, 2012 I'm kind of disappointed that I've never been that stoked about anything. You have been. You just haven't used your 'tard strength emotions to communicate your satisfaction. Yet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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