Leaving with Resentment

I should be leaving the Air Force soon if they process my paperwork right this time.

I spent a lot of time stuck in places and airframes I didn't want to be in. It was UPT and AMC. I didn't end up there due to bad performance, it was mostly due to luck and timing. I had a really hard time watching people who failed courses, struggled in UPT, got in trouble, get the assignments I wanted due to missing VMLs, waivers needed for instructor duty, changing rules, or other factors.

I feel like my youth was just... wasted and I have little to show for it. I don't have much pride in what I accomplished and I never was truly engaged or challenged.

I am angry I spent 15 years of my life generally working hard and not screwing up like many of my peers and I got exactly what I didn't want.

I have a CJO lined up which is great, but I am concerned I am going to spend the rest of my life unsatisfied because I never really scratched the itch of getting enough action or getting anything I wanted out of the Air Force. Some people suggested I stay, but after being dragged through the mud for 10 years I have significant trust issues with the institution, and watching better people than me leave for the Airlines says a lot.

Am I missing something? Was this is it, and does it get better when you separate? I don't want to be resentful for the rest of my life.

Edited 41 minutes ago41 min by illusive
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