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Alpharatz, are you a Nav, or just retarded?

Hey I know her. She works at the billeting desk at Maxwell doesn't she?

A fifth-grade teacher told her students "I'd like for one of you to tell the class a story with a moral", so little Suzy raised her hand. "OK Suzy" said the teacher, "please tell the class your story". So little Suzy says "my aunt Mary is an F-16 pilot and she got shot down over Iraq ans she had to eject from her plane. All she had with her was a pint of whiskey, a pistol and a knife. She decided to drink the whiskey on the way down so the bottle wouldn't break if she hit the ground hard. Then she landed right in the middle of 20 bad guys. She killed 12 of them with her pistol but then she ran out of ammo, so she killed seven more with her knife but then the blade broke, so she killed the last one with a karate chop that broke his neck." Horrified, the teacher says "Suzy, that's a terrible story. What kind of moral could it possibly have?" To which little Suzy replied "stay away from aunt Mary when she's been drinking."

Halfway there is a still a loooong way to go when my crystal ball says the future holds a 365, less and less flying and no end to the retarded BS. I'm too far out from check O the month club to just stick it out. I'd rather go fly for the guard/reserve as a traditional guy and get a real job. Then I still get to fly and big blue doesn't own my ass anymore.

Same thing...

This, or start your own biz while bumming. Just pulled my first drill after 8 years of AGR stupidity. Great feeling to come in, do the J-O-B, and leave knowing that I don't have to be back for a month. Got a nice beard going right now, too.

That was very difficult to read.

If you can find a full time gig in the same town as your base, it truly is one of the best jobs in the world.

I got an e-mail the other day about this. The attachment is pretty long and in-depth, so I didn't glean too much from it (although I know enough about statistics to know that you can get them to back up almost any hypothesis), but the originator of the e-mail had this to say: "It seems like AFPC doesn't always show us their manning cards, but fortune favors the bold. Attached is an analysis that someone took some time compiling. It definitely puts to rest some of the WOMs we've been hearing, so take a look at your leisure. Here's a Cliff Notes version if you want a quick snapshot: The overall Aviator Retention Pay (ARP) so far is 68%; however, if you dig through the tables, Fighter take rate last year was 59% and this year is 62%. Now, if you look at the number of eligible fighter pilots, it is 211 with 131 takers. I don't think this number includes those who are getting out (eligible until they drop their paperwork for Palace Chase, 7-day opt or 3-day Deployment opt). Taking that into account would drop that percentage to a more realistic number. Overall fighter pilot loss for FY13 (up to 30 Sept 13) is 59%. Out of 461 eligible, 276 got out. Now, take the original 131 takers of the bonus and divide that by 461 (most eligible to get out also are eligible to take the bonus assuming they are on a 10 yr pilot training commitment). The more accurate bonus take rate is about 28%. Since 2011 our continuation rate is dropping as well as our average active rated service. Basically, 60% are getting out, only 28% are taking the bonus and our overall continuation rate is dropping. So, this paper validates that 11F manning will continue to be a problem for AFPC and that the increased bonus is not meeting their intent. Remember, AFPC wanted a 65% take rate for the bonus, and is not achieving near that number of fighter pilots. Something will have to give and something has to change. What that is, who knows...your guess is as good as mine. Can we really sustain our current fighter force with 60% getting out?? Please share this with the bros as you see fit. I hope my queepery gives ya'll some SA on what our career field is facing." I'll post the actual document once I figure out how. the internet is hard.

Dafuq?

This is the funniest thing I have read today. Good 'ol Crazy Eyes.

So is Atlas hiring?

We could call it "War Operation Plan Response." Although I would recommend we don't hook it up to a modem.

They should make a movie based on this....

Isn't there some way we could just create a computer program that would monitor the world and all of our sensors and come up with launch decisions on its own? It seems like while it's waiting, it could play out every scenario that could ever happen, and be quicker to the launch sequence than actual people. It would almost be like a game to it and it would never get bored. Besides, with today's generation, you never know if someone will actually carry out a launch order or become a conscientious objector at the last second.

I think the best SEFEs are those that look at themselves primarily still as instructors but can complete Form 8s, too.

I'll tip my hat to you guys at McConnell... I've been up there a few times in a few different airframes and between the 50 non-altitude reporting bug smashers squawking 1200 filling up my TCAS and the 25 different airfields within about 10 miles of the Base I'm amazed this doesn't happen more often! I've had several co-pilots call visual saying they have the field in sight and then start heading to the wrong airport... and that is even with the magic still pointing them to the correct one!

Back from when KC-135s had navs. What's the typical front end crew complement of a -135? One dude that washed out of pilot training and two that should've.

I got some jokes about all the various crew positions...but come to think of it, a lot of them aren't too funny. I think you guys might be a little too sensitive for those. My joke was right at the weather guy. Are you a weather guy? If so...sorry. What does the 10 dollars mean? Should I have tipped the weather shop?

Might want to stand by there Heathcliff. "I remember a time" we were headed into LPLA (that still Lajes?) at night when the approach control radios failed and we were on heading to a big dark patch on the radar.........anyway the whole night had been sporting SO to get a jump on depAture in two dayz I stomped upstairs to Navy Wx shop and ordered weather.."any wx of note between here and the East Coast? says I....."Nope" says he......."thank's bye" "thanks see ya" and off we go to billeting and the next day off to KGB central (George the Crook's) for hours of merriment with the crew chiefs. Next day badly hungover..back up to Wx shop....Navy guy (who I could of sworn I saw at the Crook's..it wasn't that big a plaCE") drops the wx in front of me including a satellite photo of a full blown hurricane blocking our route home. Well what can you say? Anyway, got a nice boot in the ass going back so that was good. .....................................................we promptly named it "Hurricane Numbnuts".........