Crog

I read your post and you had me cracking up with that made-up article about Doc ordering window boxes removed. I kind of expected a joke about having students ride along with the campus cops at night, or some such nonsense......then I realized it was a REAL ARTICLE!!!! So, now everyone realizes he's crazy; always was, always will be..... Is insanity a requirement for promotion?

2. I heard Gen. Fogelman speak after his retirement, and he was more than frank about the whole sordid story. He mentioned that one of his post-retirement investments involved a port-o-potty rental company in Pueblo that he likened "most similar" to how the incident was handled. While many poke fun at the "core value" cheering squad, I have to give Fogelman serious props for not only writing it, but believing it enough to fall on his sword for what was right. Terry deserved better, and the responsibilities for Khobar's force protection failures fall (IMO) to those further up the chain and not necessarily wearing a uniform.

Borrowed the idea from someone wittier, but did make it myself......

When told by the flight attendant/crew that the mega-Samsonite just won't fit, the inevitable reply: "Well, it fit on the last airplane!" (really, I didn't know you were connecting from a C-5?!) My favorite: Irate female/business-type passenger demands to see the Captain during boarding Capt: "What's the problem, Ma'am?" Pax: "(Angrily) I was forced to check my carry-on, and I just saw the baggage handler drop it! It contains my very valuable crown jewels/crystal/Jarvik heart/etc.....!" Capt: "OK, Ma'am, can you describe the bag? I'll (get the FO to) check on it" Pax: "Oh yes! (genuinely excited), you can't miss it!.....It's a black Travel Pro!"

Oh, it's a business all right..... Just a badly run one. Face it; if we were a business we'd be bankrupt in a week! Just because you put motivational posters up in the (pick your favorite base entity here) office about serving your "customers" does not a business make. Example: CENTCOM's effort to run OEF/OIF using a FedEx model of "packages-to-schedule". How many "Tiger Teams" got HFP investigating why C-130's were flying 0-1 missions empty?! You might have a point: I think we should send feedback forms to our "customers" and ask if our weapons delivery was accurate and on-time. Of course, a "no response" should be assumed to be satisfactory.....

Is it time to revive the "zeromorale/darkside" stuff? I'd like to think that the Gordo send-up (Pope vs. The Pope) was the start of this whole thing. The EORI at Mackall AAF probably influenced the direction my career has taken more than anything else. I still look back on the Blackcat days as the hardest I ever laughed.

Now "The Deuce" is finally the best C-130 Squadron at Pope...... No flaming. The 41/2AS relationship could probably go down as one of the most productive rivalries in history. Now, where was I, oh yea, just on "Cloud 9, etc....etc....."

My copy of AFSO 21...... It landed next to my dusty copies of TQM, "Velocity Initiatives" and Mao's Little Red Book....

If memory serves, the C-141 and C-9 were CAT II. As far as I know, all the CAT III-capable are painted blue and white (OK, the C-40's are all white)..... Interestingly, airlines with CAT III capable aircraft generally don't certify every hull and crew (Delta used to be the exception; FedEx Burt?). It's a very expensive qualification to maintain, both in the training and currency arena, as well as the aircraft MX certification. It often doesn't make financial sense for the small percentages of access gained. Also, while you might be able to land 0-0, you still need to get to the gate. I'd like to see the Jepp for ETAR's low vis taxi, which would be the real measure of how much access this approach provides.

Oh yea? Where's MY ride (or for that matter, all of "our" rides)?! If possible, could you schedule a sortie to drop me off at a designated location so I can pick up my 40 acres and a mule? That'd be greeaaat.....thanks!.... - Crog

Came across this on another board. I can assure you it's real. It is without a doubt one of the best email responses I've ever read. Might want to think twice before waving that Chamber Card around.... -----Original Message----- From: [edit] USAFA Sent: Tuesday, December 12, 2006 4:59 PM To: [edit] Subject: Cadet request for F-15 ride I am a cadet at the Air Force Academy trying to arrange a flight with the 333rd Fighter Wing between 21 December and 5 January. I have my Secret Clearance and Physiological Training Card and can coordinate any AOC approval or necessary medical clearance (Form 1042). My presence does not impose any limitations on the mission; I’m just along for the ride. Any further guidance or authorization you can provide on this matter is much appreciated. Email is the best way to contact me ([edit]), but my cell phone number is [edited] Thank you for your time and consideration. Very Respectfully, X X United States Air Force Academy -------------- From: [edit] Sent: Tuesday, December 12, 2006 7:01 PM To: [ Several Names] Subject: RE: Cadet request for F-15 ride Here’s the guy who keeps calling up and bugging the scheduling shop about getting a flight. ----------------------- From: [edit] Sent: Tuesday, December 12, 2006 6:09 PM To: [edit] USAFA Cc: [lots of names] Subject: RE: Cadet request for F-15 ride You’ve got some brass balls on you, cadet. Let's break down your message and maybe we can educate you on a thing or two. “I’m a cadet at the Air Force Academy.” This message should be over right here. Period dot. Cadets don’t troll for rides, they EARN them through the proper channels just like everybody else. We’ve got a long list of maintainers who have earned awards through this wing to get incentive rides. These guys bust their asses in the freezing cold and blistering heat and only the lucky few get the privilege of having a ride. Name me three things you think you’ve done to ‘earn’ a Strike Eagle ride. Seriously. And by the way, I’ve read about all the ‘hard work’ here - http://www.gdsalumni.blogspot.com/. And I quote “The learning curve was very steep this past year as I learned about military culture and doctrine in a pretty stressful environment.” Brother, you have no idea what a stressful environment is. “trying to arrange a flight with the 333rd Fighter Wing” Sweet mother of pearl, I think I just threw up in my mouth a little. We are the 333rd Fighter Squadron, and we are a division of the 4th Fighter Wing. If you want to snivel a ride from us, you ought to at least get your facts straight. This is the foreshadowing of your ignorance, let’s continue…. “I have my Secret Clearance” Your secret clearance doesn’t mean f*** all to us. You think we’re going to take you up on a tactical sortie? You think we’re going to let you sit in on classified briefings? You think we’re going to hang out and talk tactics with you? YGBFSM. “and Physiological Training Card” Your physiological training card doesn’t mean f*** all to us. Remember all those hard working maintainers I mentioned earlier? Not one of them has a physiological training card - don’t try to impress us with that crap. “and can coordinate any AOC approval” Last time I checked, the AOC didn’t run the flying schedule of the 4th FW or coordination of our incentive flights. Apparently you’re not familiar with chain of command and proper channels. Let me tell you what this does NOT consist of; it does NOT consist of going VFR direct to the 333rd Fighter Squadron scheduling shop and bothering our hard working schedulers. This consists of you talking to your commander, your commander talking to our commander, somebody in between giving the approval, and then in the middle of your pipe dream you will be denied your flight. “My presence does not impose any limitations on the mission; I’m just along for the ride.” You couldn’t be more wrong. What exactly is it you think we do here? Do you know anything about the F-15E? Do you know anything about Seymour Johnson? Do you know anything about the 333rd? Since it would seem the answer to all of the above is a blatant ‘No’, I’ll clue you in. In the F-15E, while we do have two seats, the second seat is not an empty seat that only gets occupied when goobs like yourself call up looking for a ride. It’s a seat for qualified aircrew – we call them Weapon System Officers. He is an essential part of our mission and we don’t give him the boot for guys who are looking to bum a ride. Also, the 333rd is a Formal Training Unit. That means that we train young pilots and WSOs, so to give you a ride, we would either have to boot a student WSO in aforementioned formal course, or an instructor WSO trying to teach said student WSO. Get the picture?

Three things I remember about Maxwell.... 1) Thinking that the "Capt" housing was pretty nice the first day I drove on base....realizing later it was "Navy Capt", and everyone else below 0-5 was living in crap. 2) The Sunday morning with a raging hangover that I began to report my car stolen, and midway through the conversation realized I'd probably left it somewhere near the brewpub....("Uh, never mind....") 3) Several memorable roadtrips to Destin and New Orleans (Destin: Sammy's has better scenery, but the Green Frog is more fun), and rolling back on base Monday morning just in time to fall asleep in Polifka. [ 04. November 2006, 08:35: Message edited by: Crog ]

I'm glad she's OK too. I am bracing myself for the service-wide embarrassment that is coming (never mind how the host nation reacts). I really hope I'm wrong and the ending is just what it is. However, this has to be the flakiest story since the bus full of Hispanics grabbed the google-eyed bride on their way to New Mexico.

Scooter14 could not have said it better.... "There are differences between a foot stomp, a reference, a question bank and the actual test. My opinion is this...if it helps everyone and you are still learning the material, good to go. If it's giving a select few an advantage, then bullshit." I think my MTO mentioned the location of the nearest Kinko's and price they were charging for the MQF to my class the first week on the flight line. He followed that up by saying "....and don't ever let any of us catch you with it on this base". The rules were straight forward: "get all the info you can, help your brothers out, you might even see an occasionally recycled question, but don't be stupid about it". Showing up with a crib sheet labeled "1.A, 2.C, 3.D...." is way over the top. That's not "gouge", that's a free ride. I find it even more shocking that these guys were so arrogant as to not try to limit the "knowledge liability" by spreading the wealth. My own opinion as to the "rightness and wrongness" aside, but did they actually think they could create that much of a class-wide gradebook disparity and get away with it? As a minimum, they were stupid. And stupid people make bad aviators. I'll leave the moral stuff in my glass house at the bottom of an active quarry.....

Quick question: I heard around the water cooler that the whole thing fell apart because those with the gouge simply refused to share with all of the class. Not justifying dropping the dime, just the impression I was given was that there was an "in" clique (the female and "IP-drinking buddies") and everyone else....Any validity to this?

The MPD program fails to properly prepare the students for their wartime mission (which, by reg, has them in the right seat). With a motivated instructor who is basically working his/her ass off in the right seat, a new MPD pilot can perform passably in the left seat on Pro sorties. I'm assuming this is how the gradebooks are getting through LRF. This said, we've been floored by how poorly the MPD pilots are doing in the right seat during unit indoc. I would compare it to about the 3rd ride of CP school, which is not a coincidence based on the design of the FTU MPD program. I do not blame this problem on the MPD candidate, or the hapless schoolhouse instructor who has to sell this crap. Even certain people at AMC training will admit this is a disaster (off the record), mostly because "the C-17/C-5 template goes awry when you apply it to the all-tac C-130 fleet". I will mention that I have not heard one positive thing about this program with the exception that "it saves money", and theoretically, the schoolhouse can "finally" get caught up. I find the last part disturbing, because the FTU has been behind since Leo Sullivan flew Herks, and I suspect if it ever did get caught up, it would only lead to one of the Seven Seals of the Apocalypse fracturing..... However, I don't think it's going away. "It saves money" for more Tankers/C-17s/F-22's (never mind that "CP" unit indoc is approaching the same hours/duration as the old FTU - that's a Sq problem), and AMC is basically sick of the C-130 MPD program getting bashed. Their solution was to tightly limit who can provide feedback on the program. If you don't like the complaints, stick your fingers in your ears..... Just because it wasn't the way you were trained doesn't mean it's bad. But, if the squadron can't get your unit indoc performance in your "wartime seat" to an acceptable level in a few rides, then the program is failing the student, fellow crewmembers, and the needs of the Air Force.