Great first post! Someone sent you running to BASEOPS.NET to create an account, and defend yourself. Welcome to the FORUM...and btw, the Air Force is a small place too. Don't send any email talking about your exploits to your "buddy", because it will be around the world within hours! You know you all read that email. So you run your mouth when you have a little whiskey...slow down with the bottle LT!

The lesson learned here:

Don't write letters, talk on the phone, send emails, or post drunk.

HD

Originally posted by RabidWombat:

... asking how I was faring with the ladies down here in corpus ...

Ah, you're at Corpus now. Perhaps you should learn the phrase, "Te gusta montar el aburro?"

No worries, Wombat. We've all been there.

I've seen the retarded dolphin trainer in action. It's one of the funniest things I've ever seen. Especially when the chick is so dumb that she asks, "How do you know they're retarded". Classic

Portugese Arm Wrestling Champion (must be darker skinned, and somewhat in good shape, or pick you're own country/sport. Like always the more obscure the better) worked like a champ a few times for my buddy.

Cooter

Originally posted by RabidWombat:

OK, first let me say... I had no idea playboy was going to print that little gem. It was born of a bitter night of whiskey and cokes... alone. It was a nice little surprise to get an email from my USEM(you know, the guy who gives your class stand ups) asking how I was faring with the ladies down here in corpus with a copy of the article pasted to the bottom of his email. In my own defense, I hardly ever talk about aviation outside of work. There is nothing I can say that will make me sound less of a tool than the playboy article indicates.... except maybe "the next round's on me" just look me up

Drive Fast, Smoke in Bed, Socialize with women of ill-repute,

BC

VT-31/06-42

NAS Corpus Christi(3months to wings!)

PS HerkChik, I don't see whats wrong with a life of xbox, porn, and planes (and beer/whiskey).

Hah, hopefully for you 31 and the wing haven't got ahold of this. If they have, then don't be surprised if they forward it to Little Rock. My friend's sister wrote a letter to CNATRA (the admiral himself) based on his venting about P-3s... something about rusty buckets. They put a copy of the letter behind his winging certificate with "CC: VP-30" on it.

3 Months from wings huh... you should have been able to find yourself some SNAGs down there by now. If not, take some friday nights off from Utopia and go hit up Ferrah's and the Islander... stay till closing and bat cleanup.

And of course, there is always Wiskey River Weds.

Urinal puck salesman works great....So I hear...

I've been telling the guys here in A Town that I'm a flight attendant. It only seems to work on the pilots, though. :confused:

DoD contracted pool cleaner (And you're in town attending an international pool cleaning conference)

Go-cart mechanic

And when the going get's tough (like in Enid or any asian country) just tell the story of the Karate Kid triology as your own.

Originally posted by GBock:

And when the going get's tough (like in Enid or any asian country) just tell the story of the Karate Kid triology as your own.

Be careful, Karate Kid is supposed to hit the theaters in Enid next month.

HD

Originally posted by GBock:

Go-cart mechanic

I was a go cart mechanic on the beach growing up. Great job!! Many new vacationing Coeds every week.

ferrel cat management specialist

Don't forget Chinchilla Breeder.

HD

How about "the government pays me to play xbox and look at porn".

I always use "I'm a sheppard" (Fletch F Fletch). Rarely works, but I think its funny and that's all that madders to me. If the chick thinks its funny, ice broken....how ya doing. If it doesn't, who cares. If she knows what it is from, then I get that good old fashion feeling like I would do anything to bone her...

down here in Corpus I say I work at walmart, then the girls reply "oh, I haven't seen you there" to which I give that look of "exactly" and then they stare back with a blank look wondering if that means I will buy them a drink.

I suppose if you're at XL like me, you could always go to Mexico. Im sure twenty bucks would go a looooong way.

Octopus Trainer. They are ill-tempered.

Work for the circus - get shot out of the cannon.

Professional Live Bait Trainer with the rating of 'Master Baiter'

Environmental Sanitation Engineer (trash man)

Door-to-door tupperware salesman

After much searching, this was the thread most pertinent to my question. Although the fake jobs are fun (lighthouse construction worker hadn't been mentioned yet), isn't dropping a "i'm a pilot" line supposed to charm the panties off your target? Now, obviously it won't work in Valdosta, Laughlin, Vance, etc., but where the pilots are a little more scarce shouldn't this be an easy kill?

What are the TTPs on how to drop this in conversation?

After much searching, this was the thread most pertinent to my question. Although the fake jobs are fun (lighthouse construction worker hadn't been mentioned yet), isn't dropping a "i'm a pilot" line supposed to charm the panties off your target? Now, obviously it won't work in Valdosta, Laughlin, Vance, etc., but where the pilots are a little more scarce shouldn't this be an easy kill?

What are the TTPs on how to drop this in conversation?

You just throw it out there.

"How do you know when a fighter pilot enters the room? He'll tell you".

"How do you know a date with a fighter pilot is half over? He says 'enough about my plane, let's talk about me'".

Gee, having a hard time picking up girls in Valdosta? First, why would you want to? Second, two words: Tallahassee and Gainesville. If you morons can't figure out that the Remerton crowd ain't exactly the best and brightest, then by all means, keep pluggin' away at Mellow Mushroom. And watch "Officer and a Gentleman" while you're at it.

The gene pool in Valdosta has been systematically depleted over the past sixty years enough to render its inhabitants on par with Deliverance. Get out of town!

Deliverance??? ROFL! DMEG is RIGHT... must be why I hear banjo music every time I drive through that town...

I'm glad this thread keeps popping up from time to time. Makes ripping on BC pretty easy.

#1-Business owner of a Tube Steak Delivery Service

#2-QC for Budweiser

#3-Don't work, it's against your religion

#4-Fish farmer

#5-Mechanical bull tester

#6-Professional traveler

#7-Airbag tester

These all have worked at one time or the other, you just have to know your audience, make some shit up, stick to it and have fun. Lots of drinks help too. If dude still can't get laid he must be .

Edited February 19, 200817 yr by Marco

Can't go with telling them you get paid to put a pole in a hole

Tell them you're the regional sales rep for "United Shoe And Footwear" ... and then ask their shoe size and let 'em know you can provide some free samples of the latest lines.