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Alpharatz

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Posts posted by Alpharatz

    Leadership at the 'Deid

    in General Discussion

    Posted

    I'm not so sure that taking Bagram anyday is really a wise decision. The other day I was busted coming out of the wood house shower by a first shirt that likes to camp out around 1130 in the shady area and bust people for uniform infractions. Apparently, after pulling my shirt on, my right sleeve became rolled up. As I am walking out of the door, with flip-flops on, a towel over my shoulder and a shaving kit and dirty clothes in my hands, I hear a voice yell "Hey!" I turn around to see a SMSgt shirt with a nicely pressed uniform standing there with a cold bottle of water. Wondering who the hell he was yelling at, he follows up with "You need to roll your sleeves down. Come on, you need to be part of the solution, not part of the problem!" Since I had no idea that my sleeve had become rolled up, but given the fact that he was looking directly at me, I kindly said "excuse me?" He then proceeds to storm over to me and point to my right sleeve. He continued on with "Do you need a refresher on the PT uniform policy?" I kindly said "no, thank you," turned my back and began to walk off. Well, he wasn't done. He follows me and tells me to roll my sleeve down. I roll my sleeve down, say thank you again and walk off. Perhaps if I had not just finished another 16-hour day, I could have come up with a good whopper to fire back at him. As I was walking back to my oven-like B-hut, trying not to roll my ankles on the gigantic chunks of white rock, I began to wonder if the reason that the shirt was such an asshole was because he was unhappy having his own shitter and shower in his RLB. This probably wasn't the case; he probably had to drop off his own laundry that day or maybe he didn't get a good seat at movie night. Or maybe, just maybe, they didn't have enough Diet Coke at the chow hall. Either way, I still laugh when I think about people who have so little to do that they will hang out, doing nothing, waiting to make themselves feel needed by jumping in other people's shit. What do I know though?

    At one time if you had butch looking guyz with perfect grooming and impeccable duds hanging around restrooms and showers especially if they were making up excuses to contact the patrons.....eventually someone would call the Vice Squad and they would assign some officers to FRUIT PATROL (not my terminology) and that would soon be the end to that.

    ......................."roll down them sleeves you blue eyed devil".............

    WTF? (**NSFW**)

    in Squadron Bar

    Posted

    YGBFSM.

    NFW the Navy can even come close to managing something like China v Taiwan. NFW.

    Perhaps I didn't express myself clearly. In any case probably not to be debated here.

    .......Dammit, hike your a## out of that casino and get that drone headed my way, I'm surrounded......by experts......

    WTF? (**NSFW**)

    in Squadron Bar

    Posted

    You lost me at the word "You." What does my jab at WSOs have to do with comparative worth to current contingency operations?

    If North Korea or Straits of Taiwan kick off, is your notional army general going to be asking his HBCT captains and majors what they are doing to match the fighter pilots? How about your SWO LTs and LCDRs, what are they doing right now?

    First I am assuming that "you" are a single seat fighter pilot. Then I am expanding my association concerning 200 or even 50#'s of fuel to TRY and justify including YOUR 200 lb carcass much less a second guy. Sort of jumping from the "I don't need no help" attitude to the RAPIDLY solidifying "maybe we don't need YOU either" attitude. I personally think that we DO need "YOU" (see assumptions above) but we also need WSO's. As for the Navy...I think they are worried and should be when Ron Paul and Barney Frank are prancing hand in hand to budget meetings. But to be honest; If I was Barry I would use the Navy to defend the Straits of Mollucca (Mollusca?) before Formosa....Korea? who knows? They also chase pirates and have fired more shots in anger recently than any F-22 (a good thing). I hesitate to add this last but as far as a "notional Army General" He could be your CO sooner than you think. SOOOO... to do a quick 180 back into WTF thread territory (jeez I love that talk).....WTF do I tell my Senator and Congressman when I call them after the latest budget threat? They want to close all the bases in Europe.

    See? It's sort of like a free associating conversation only in writing...no choking and kicking

    • Upvote 1

    WTF? (**NSFW**)

    in Squadron Bar

    Posted

    200 Lbs? Good if you can get it but I'd settle for 50. Or even just the silence.

    You may be getting more silence than you are hoping for sitting on the ramp in your multi-mega buck ride waiting for an increasingly unlikely mission to occur. That is, if the ride gets bought at all. If I was an army General I would be looking at an F-22 pilot and then at my own Captains and Majors and asking what the pilot is doing that begins to match what those guys are doing. And i'm commenting as a fairly robust supporter.

    I believe in the value of air support...my Senator barely knows what it is

    • Upvote 1

    Oxcart Project

    in Squadron Bar

    Posted

    The sad part is that it's not just the "defense" industry but just about every industry...cooking the books..gold-plating products...."me too..me-too" drug copies that might work or might not. Defense is just especially good at munching on the Federal grand tetons..Meanwhile what the whole DOD needs (a new tanker) lounges in acquisition hell....now I forgot the topic....oh yeah, once saw an SR puke a fuel line mid-air...stream of fuel 3-4 miles long and a dash for the ground.

    ...........excuse me, is that petroleum surging out of there or are you just glad to see me?...

    I had a chance to sit in the RSO seat of one at Beale just after they retired them. Years later, I was amazed at how similar the look and feel was to the B-52 I flew. I guess it goes to show you don't need glass (and billions in cost overruns) to do the mission well.

    We'll never see airplanes like that again. The acquisition system as it is now would never allow it. Instead of building something that is feasible for a good price, the defense industry builds something we don't need and convinces us that we must have it no matter what the cost, and then charges us ten times more than the originally contracted price.

    Possibly one way to fix it? Prohibit anyone over the rank of O5 from working in the defense industry. My building is packed to the gills with former GO/FOs 'consulting' for defense firms and pushing the exact capes of systems their companies are making. I worked in J8 and watched them come and go daily. It's worse when they haven't worn a uniform in 20+ years and drool at the conference table during briefings.

    NASA's new mission

    in General Discussion

    Posted

    Well, you have to remember that "some of our people" are operating on the "skills" and "training" and "experience" of your average mid-level lawyer....which is to say no engineering, math, science, military, industrial etc. etc. experience at all. Good at basketball I hear....

    .....Maybe NASA can make some use of those flying carpets"

    Gun Talk

    in Squadron Bar

    Posted

    Ah, yes...once was hiking an old beat up 12 Ga riot gun up to my shoulder when it went off.....The old finger on the trigger ploy combined with a worn out action. (I didn't own it) Knocked my glasses sideways and gave me a nice boo boo. Fortunately it was pointed in a safe direction. Never trusted one again and re-trained the trigger finger. And I agree...nice discipline with the rifle.

    Also favor revolvers like that Bulldog....just a little extra decision time.

    "any shootin iron used for real is likely to end up in perpetual evidence..so use something cheap"

    Can't remember if this has been posted; but give the dude credit, he maintains proper control of his weapon despite taking a hot round (from the guy on his left) down the back of his shirt!

    34erj48.gif

    :rock:

    Cheers! M2

    Video proof that not everyone should own a gun...

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    One more...

    animated-gifs-9-04.gif

    I Hate Reflective Belts

    in Squadron Bar

    Posted

    Just got back from an exercise where, on the board in the mayors tent right alongside the MOPP and FPCON level, they had posted a reflectivecon level, I shit you not. I almost fell over when I saw that, thought my command didn't generally adhere to that kind of gayness. Pretty sad really.

    I could never keep it straight whether the DEFCON 1 was really good or really bad...then THREATCON came along and I think it was reversed...1 is good (I think)....I suggest a new one....."STUPIDCON" only use ALFA thru FOX..like grades easy to remember A is good at being stupid....F is bad at being stupid, which I guess would be good except..Oh, forget it...

    Anyway, feel free to use this idea and note it on an OER if you need the gong.

    "Attention on deck..STUPIDCON ALFA..all non-essential dumbos leave the area..essential dumbos sign in with the quartermaster"

    When wives talk shop

    in General Discussion

    Posted

    Not one foot below minimums. Period.

    250 below 10. Period

    Etc. Etc. Period

    Thou, wench, shall never utter the name of a sacred wingman. Period.

    Raindude, have you ever seen a talk by a Naval Flight Surgeon called "Sex and the Aviator"?

    "Let's keep the peckers pointed North boys.....er...and girls (sts)

    • Upvote 3

    Air Refueling

    in General Discussion

    Posted

    What? When was that? I suppose it hit the Caliente Hospital, too. New Thunderdome restriction SFC-UNL 200nm radius?

    Many, many moons ago senor...and yes, the Caliente Hospital was completely destroyed

    Also...I apologize for Annex C. Is "New Thunderdome" a re-make?

    "I wonder how a couple of hostile fighters loose in the airspace would change things"

    Air Refueling

    in General Discussion

    Posted

    It's been a while but I can't ever remember any of this airborne bickering and snorting between tankers and receivers. Sometimes they just showed up...no one said a word and off they went; side lights aglow...Unless you count the Egyptian F-16's rolling in from who knows where jabbering loudly in Hindoo or some such. But If they were complaining I couldn't understand the lingo anyway. So, what's up guys?

    Annex A. My pal did have a missile cook off thru the the formation at Red Flag

    Annex B. Probably get more ionizing radiation from being at high altitude than a

    radar unless you ask an E-3 to heat your flight snack

    Annex C. you can do anything to an A-10 and they can't catch you.

    I Hate Reflective Belts

    in Squadron Bar

    Posted

    If this is accurate you have to instantly get the politically connected heavy hitters in your flying squadron on the case. They should know what to do re: Governor...US Senator etc. Any well placed retirees? Is this so called "Commander" an active duty type who was air-dropped in as I hear is happening?

    "Time to hit the club for some debauchery and a sacrifice or two"

    Spelling pet peeves

    in General Discussion

    Posted

    I hate the word "tarmac" quite a skoshi da*n bit....tarmac this tarmac that....especially when I hear a sentence like "I think we just parked on some soft tarmac"

    "That crazy O-6 in personnel haS ORDERED his staff to start wearing cris-crossed reflector belts. They ran out to watch us sinking into the tarmac. Looked like the Mexican Army in "Viva Zapata" only glowing. One got squished by a tug"

    Leadership at the 'Deid

    in General Discussion

    Posted

    Since I have no current knowledge of USAF leadership other than what I read in Baseops, I do kind of wonder if there is a certain amount of excess complaining/whining which of course would be normal. What I see in my kids current AF Magazine really has me wondering. I like to look over the nice color pictures of the senior leaders and the first thing that leapt to mind was.....Why are these men smiling? Other than Chandler, Deptula, Hoffman, North and the Historian for Christ sake they look like a convention of prosperous dentists who happen to have the same tailor. So I thumb back a few pages to a picture of Billy Mitchell who I must say looks pretty bummed. Ever see a picture of Gen Lemay where he DIDN'T look like he wanted to kick somebody in the nuts? At the back of the mag they have pictures of some real heavy hitters most of whom look like they have just...SURPRISE...been through a war. Maybe this whole screed is a cheap shot but I fail to see under current conditions what is making Schwartz the Chief of staff so happy. Prozac in the water at the Pentagon? Denial? Too much puss......Ooop's sorry...

    ....."To lure the wily dentist out of his lair we built a crude driving range".........

    Air Force vs Navy

    in General Discussion

    Posted

    Having had some fairly recent experience with the Coast Guard and just today reading about a retired Coastie who apparently is kicking ass and taking names in the civilian world. I would suggest considering the Coast Guard.

    Cons:

    No Fighters

    Attached to the Godless homeland security

    Very small

    Pros:

    Daily operational mission

    On scene decision making is expected

    Very small

    No fighters

    Did I mention fun?

    Good NON-military/NON-aviation books

    in Squadron Bar

    Posted

    Islands in The Stream........ Hemingway (does reference a Spitfire; booze; mentionable style love)

    Shadow Divers........... Kurson (sort of peripherally military, nothing G.I. though)

    ................."This is a very bad moment for both of us"......................

    Capt Malinda Hammond IS My Hero!

    in Squadron Bar

    Posted

    It is obvious that I am hopelessly out of the loop....but WHY would a Marine Col. hesitate to order a Lance Corporal into instant physical restraint for not only DISOBEYING him....but threatening HIM with arrest at the scene of a fatal military crash no less?

    Herr Gott!!!!!

    ...........................................Peckers pointed North? Apparently not.....................

    Losing Air Dominance

    in General Discussion

    Posted

    My Uncle flew P-38's with 94th Pursuit prior to Pearl Harbor...then out of Long Beach...for gunnery practice they shot clay pigeons except "no one really wanted to spend the extra money for shotgun shells". From time to time he would get a little feisty and snort that " I never want to see the U.S. military that un-prepared again". He isn't around to ask BUT I have to believe that ....

    He would be happy with F-22's OR F-35's

    He would believe that "stealth is life"

    He would not be happy with 50 y.o. tankers; and fighters falling apart mid-air

    Now my thoughts....

    How do you SNEAK UP on a target with an airplane that is twice as noisy as an F-16? How do you train with it when even neighbors who are obviously noise tolerant don't want it around?

    All stealth all the time

    If I was the CNO I would be mighty nervous about those Carrier Battle Groups.

    MORE B-2's and the F-35 should be a two seater.............

    ................."Pilots man your cubbies......Away all Alert Drones....Coffee to Hot Battery Bus"........

    USAA

    in General Discussion

    Posted

    After "a long time" I am really beginning to wonder about USAA. In fact I hesitated for quite a while to add to the discussion until today. I struggled through the highly irritating computer lady menu. Finally got an explanation of why my car insurance has increased over 10 Percent in one year; asked for a phone number to some (any) USAA executive to complain about the borderline usable automation;

    and was given a phone number that's out of service..My USAA financial guy wants me to switch everything to USAA. I don't have the heart to tell him that it takes me two minutes to get in touch with the locals and with USAA it takes dealing with the computer lady.....rowing thru multiple menus...maybe getting the correct shop..it took me literally uncounted phone calls...discussions etc. to e-mail some files. It took my lawyers office one phone call and about two minutes to get multiple files from them to me. Soooooo.....what's up with USAA?

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